i used to be so proud of myself, because i was open-minded, i was someone who would embrace change. i would be willing to go anywhere and do anything, no matter how far-flung, no matter how preposterous. i would not say no, if the Lord said go.
and then He said go.
and i said no.
or i wanted to, at least.
but after spending months and months in the slow death of winter, i am beginning to see signs of spring. and in, perhaps, the least likely of ways.
let me explain:
the very parts of me that felt like they were killing me have become the very things that are brining me to life. the things that i thought i hated, i have been called to. and though i came in with feet dragging, i am seeing that i don't hate them, and i don't hate the fact that i belong with them.
i am learning to celebrate the very things that make me human. my failure to transcend this world is nothing more than a glorious revelation that i was never meant to be able to on my own. and i'm not out of it yet. in fact, i believe that Jesus wants to make my life transcendent, but He can't do that until my own frailty has been well established.
so i will rejoice, therefore, in all my weaknesses ....
it's never been truer.